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The Fearless Factor-The Wisdom to Know it’s Me

by Jacqueline Wales

“The shortest path to oneself leads around the world.” – Count Hermann Keyserling

Why is change so hard? We run, hide, deny, avoid, make excuses, blame other people or circumstances, and generally do our best to avoid the inevitable.

The simple truth is…change is hard. And it’s essential to your growth as a human being.

Everything in life is about change. Nothing stands still, except maybe buildings, and even they crumble and fall. And yet, we persist in our attempts to deny change.

It’s simple really. When we resist change we are avoiding pain. We fear loss, we fear abandonment, rejection, humiliation and failure. And sometimes, we even fear success. All of this involves some process of change. Letting go and creating something new.

In my work as a leadership development coach, I frequently ask my client “what are you willing to give up?” I’m usually talking about the habits that don’t serve you, the limiting beliefs and thoughts that dominate your life, the people who don’t have your best interests at heart, and a myriad of circumstances that are wasting your precious time.

Instead of looking at ourselves, we frequently spend our lives trying to change the people around us, or the circumstances instead of stopping to have a good look at ourselves.

This is where the rubber meets the road. It often seems easier to avoid discomfort, and continue doing what you’ve always done, because change demands that you give something up. To minimize the anxiety produced by change, and to accomplish your desired results, you must be willing to tolerate the discomfort that arises when you begin to change yourself.

One of the defining traits of successful people is resilience. The ability to bounce back, to meet challenges, and find a path of least resistance. Developing resilience means becoming more conscious in your thinking. It’s about taking the time to consider events before reacting to them, and with time, develop greater awareness on how your thinking impacts the way you feel, think and act.

Resilience is about understanding your ‘hot buttons’. The things that set you off, that draw your into confrontation, or cause you to feel less than you really are. With resilience you develop more flexibility, to ‘go with the flow’ which allow more opportunities to open up for you.

Watch Jacqueline Wales Tele-Insight, “Turning Obstacles Into Opportunties’”

About Jacqueline Wales